For most of my adult life, I’ve served in ministry in one form or another. From completing two different ministry schools to leading worship, running small groups, organizing outreaches, teaching kids, joining short term missions trips—you name it, I’ve likely done it.
And for years, I did it all without ever expecting to be paid. (Honestly, it didn’t even cross my mind.)
Not because I was trying to be noble, but because the culture I was in never suggested otherwise. The unspoken message was: If you really love God, you’ll serve without expecting anything in return.
So I did—wholeheartedly.
I took Colossians 3:23 to heart—“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord…” I saw my time and gifts as a spiritual offering, and for many years, I served with joy. I trusted Jesus to compensate me in whatever way He chose. And truly, I can see how I was blessed in those years.
But over time, something shifted…
I began noticing some internal fatigue, mental exhaustion, then low grade resentment.
But instead of listening to those signals, I pushed them down. I told myself I just needed a better attitude. That I was being selfish for wanting more.
Here’s what had started to happen (but I couldn’t name at the time):
I had begun self-abandoning in the name of Christian duty.
Somewhere along the way, I had absorbed the belief that being paid for my work—especially spiritual or service-oriented work—was “less godly.” That money and ministry were incompatible.
That if I really loved Jesus, I’d just keep giving without ever asking for anything in return.
Here’s what I believe now:
Wanting to be compensated doesn’t make you less spiritual. It means you’re honoring the time, energy, and value you bring into the world.
These days, I still serve for free sometimes—joyfully.
The only difference? It’s just not automatic anymore. I’m more thoughtful with my ‘yes’ and ‘no.’
Intentional serving matters to me.
I check in with my heart and with Holy Spirit. Can I give from a wholehearted yes? (2 Cor. 9:7)
If not, then it’s a no. Or, at the very least, it’s a pause, until I can give from my heart.
I’ve grown enough to recognize that resentment often indicates a boundary is being crossed; that desire can be a form of Divine guidance.
Do I still wrestle with guilt sometimes? That I should be doing more?
Sure. But now I know it’s not the Holy Spirit speaking—it’s old programming.
I want to say this, to the version of me who didn’t know it, and to anyone else who needs to hear it:
- You’re not bad for wanting to be paid.
- You’re not greedy for valuing your gifts.
- You’re not less Christian for building a business that honors your worth.
You, my friend, are not called to burnout disguised as devotion. You’re called to overflow.
If this stirred something in you—if you’ve felt tangled in your own money + faith story—this is the work I do with my clients.
You don’t have to untangle it alone. Let’s gently begin the work of rewriting the story, together.
If you’d like to explore what this could look like in a safe, supportive environment, grab a FREE 30-minute discovery call and let’s chat.
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